We were stumbling down an alley behind businesses and stone faced

dwellings for trendy young families and local hipsters. They were the kind

who bought their food from co-ops but didn’t volunteer. They drove expensive cars

they wore expensive clothes and their booze was so high brow

it swam into their hair lines. We were just kids. The leaves,

those tender little green things that turned the world sweet

in daylight, were casting shadows in the night. I showed you

the way they danced upon the asphalt as we made

our way to yet another party. You’d never noticed the ground

before. Not like that. You thought I was clever. Later

I was just another lost fool. Another loser you would

eventually

never think about, never care to know.

I was young then. I was foolish. I saw beauty and I conjured darkness.

I fucked your boyfriend. I am sorry. This is not some AA confession.

This is whiskey and memory

and the fact that you will never give me a chance to be

more than any of that.